


Harry Styles?

by lost_in_the_dark



Category: Larry Stylinson - Fandom, One Direction (Band)
Genre: Abuse, Angst, Anorexia, Brthers, Cutting, Eating Disorders, Ed Sheeran - Freeform, F/M, Family, Gay Sex, Lies, Lost Harry, M/M, Multi, New York, Past Abuse, Past Relationship(s), Read, Sad Louis, Sadness, Self-Harm, Sisters, Thief, Thief Harry, Thief Identidy, dies, discussions, hapiness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-15
Updated: 2015-10-12
Packaged: 2018-04-12 14:58:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 2,991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4483745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lost_in_the_dark/pseuds/lost_in_the_dark
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry Styles is really Harry Styles?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Alex ...

**_"My scars are fading and I feel lost without them."_ **

_______________________

**_Louis PoV._ **

_What makes me think that I'm pretty? Why not just ceased to exist? Why I do so many questions?_

Just I feel the blood running while I think and feel a little pain.

Way to the bathroom and wash my cuts. After I finish, l leave the bathroom and take off my clothe to sleep.

Already in the bed i remember I'll always be alone all my childhood. I remember when mom disappeared for almost a year when I was 9. After a week I had to go too the neighbor and she nursed me during that time. She never told the police but when Jay **returned,** the neighbor warned her. I remember too that she called Mrs. Paterson. From that moment i started working in a supermarket carrying shopping bags and began to save money. 

I have no friends, Jay which is supposed to be my mother go from bar to bar and my father never met him but I think it will be an alcoholic who's had a night with Jay. 

I don't know why I try to sleep if always think of something bad. I notice that i'm crying and do I get sleep as all previous nights. 

\- - - - - - - - - - - 

A fucking sound  interrupt me in my dream and see that is the alarm clock, I also noticed that I have dried tears on my cheeks. 

I have to work today because I'm the one paying the sent of the apartment as Jay do not pay. I consider my own apartment and I thank Mrs. Paterson for taking care of me during that year and help me with the rent. I have  thought to rent Jay's room so I can have some extra money to save for future college.

i get up out of bed and put aside thoughts. Seeking the uniform of the library, it's really not a uniform but I always carry something similar.

_Long Sleeve shirt_

_Black jeans_

_Black vans_

I changed and when I reached the door I'm about to open when somebody outside knocks. I panic because there is only one person who knows where i live besides Jay,

Alex...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry if I'm late but I started school and had not had time to raise the chapter. The chapter is short. :(  
> Something important , thank you for the comments and kudos that makes me write to you.
> 
> Love,  
> -someone? xx


	2. Chapter 2

**Change my mind - One Direction.**

**More than this - One Direction.**

→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→

**"The surrest thing about me is that I will change my mind."**

**-Claire Forlani.**

←←←←←←←←←←←←←

Alex ...

I feel the tears running down my cheeks. I panicked and I fear what might be behind the door.

I have different times with him in my head. Everything was bad and ugly, and I never realized. I'm so quiet but with such a loud and destroyed mind.

I do not want him back. I do not want him in my life. I do not need it. Still knocking on the door and that increases my tears.

\- Louis! - IS HIM .

Is Alex, he can not be here. He does not belong here. Alex is part of a past, a past that I could not overcome. A past that still haunts me.

\- Louis is Alex open the door!

I do not want to return to the same nightmare before. I want to overcome this shit but I still feel something for him.

\- Louis please, I know that I hurt you but I want to apologize. I want to get it right, please open.- his voice is weak.

Is crying?

Quiet a bit of my tears and get up from the floor. Way out the door and I hear through of it.

Is crying.

I'm afraid to open the door and everything is a false order to repeat the past in the present. I hate being weak but I don't have force to open the door and face Alex.

\- Louis, please give me a chance. - He says crying.

I do not expect more and open the door. Alex, the same I met, the same as fall in love and the one that broke me.

We do not talk we just look. It's been a year since I leave it and escape. After a while of watching stay, I feel a arms surround and panic increased.

-Do not touch me! - pushed him back.

-Louis, Sorry, but I needed.

\- You did not think so when you make the damage. - I did not look into his eyes, at no time did. If I look, I will fall again.

-Louis, look at me - do not look- Look at me.

I look at it.

-Louis, I apologize. I know your pain does not compare to anything in this world. But I want to fix it. I do not want to feel more guilt about this. I want to do good. I want to make you happy, smiling back to that guy who was a brilliant diamond but now this opaque because of me. I want to make you happy Louis, seriously. - He still crying.

-You want to do so many things but most of them are imposible. There are damaged things that can not be fixed, Alex.

I feel so rubbish.

\- Give me a chance and I'll prove it.

\- To show me what, Alex!?! Show me that you are a liar who does not value me. That lie to me. What do you want of me? You take it all.- my voice was strong, now is weak . - I have nothing Alex, nothing.

The fear turned to anger.

\- That's why I'm here, Louis. I want to return everything that I take but for that I need a chance. If you give it to me we can start again.

\- Another serious opportunity to make things right.

\- You give me a chance?

I think a little.

\- If I give you the opportunity and you have to start over as if we don't knew us. You'll have to earn my trust. -I say this in a serious tone.

\- Hello, my name is Alex White.

\- Louis Tomlinson.

I feel this is a mistake.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, ✌ 
> 
> Chapter 2
> 
> Is very shity but I was trying to make it better. Thanks for the kudos. 


	3. Chapter 3

**Songs:**

**√Little Things - One Direction.**

**√Something's Missing - Sheppard**

**√Geek Tragedy - The Wombats**

**Quote:**

**"Everything is hard before it is easy."**

**\- Goethe.**

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

After Alex went I spent lying in bed thinking and crying while.

I was surprised that Alex was so quiet when I shouted, in a past maybe he gonna want to hit me. Maybe he change but then I think it's all a fake.

Yesterday I had to excuse me for work. In the condition it was could not go to work. Everything that happened yesterday has left me a little embarrassed. So I decide to go for a walk.

° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° •

 I wear a walking time, not thinking about anything. I look around and think I'm in a very popular park.

// Flashback //

_-Love, You want some ice cream? - Alex asks with a few blue-green eyes shining._

_Sure - smiled and pulled out a little curl of her hair._

_\- I'll be back. - I see it going away and I watched him from afar._

_For now I feel someone sit next to me._

_-Hi - says a smiling boy._

_\- Hello?_

_\- My name is Ashton - reaches out to greet._

_\- My name is Louis. - Shook my hand too._

_\- Really Louis? You ask us to come to the park to meet him. - He says pointing to Ashton, who is a little confused._

_-Alex is not what you think ... - will not let me finish talking and screams again._

_\- That's not what I think? Louis, you were holding his hand. - Is furious. - Get up we go home_

_. - Do not wanna go home. - I say in a serious tone._

_\- Louis get up now._

_I get up and go my way to the car._

_° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° •_

_On the way home nobody talks. The air becomes tense to me makes me hard to breathe. When I got home I'm the first to get out of the car. I need air urgently. After I close my door so does Alex. We go in silent to the apartment. And when we walked in Alex speaks:_

_\- Louis this is not over . - His standing behind me a few meters but still did not turn to him._

_\- Alex I will not argue with you. What you saw was a mistake._

_\- I'm not going to argue._

_I relax to hear those words. In a fast moving, Alex is over me on the floor. His kissing me hard and do not like it. I try to shake it off but I can not._

_\- Alex ..._

_\- Shut up bitch. - It gives me a slap._

_My tears start to come and continue with the homework to shake it off but I can't. Alex is much bigger than me, I can never refer. He starts to take off his pants and then do more strength to shake it off, my attempts are unsuccessful._

_-Do not! Alex, please._

_-I told you to shut up dirty bitch. - He hit me again. I give up. In his green-blue eyes I don't see love, I see anger._

_Now Alex don't have his pants and he take mines out with a hand. I turn and now I'm upside down. I feel like my underwear down and cried harder._

_-Please... Aahh - I scream._

_Alex just entered me without my being prepared, without lubricant. And its hurting me and he does not even care. I know that Alex is claiming to be love of my life. He keeps doing his thing and I suffer for his actions._

_Alex runs in me._

_He gets up and leaves._

// End Flashback //

• ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • ° • °

That was the first day I met at Alex unfeeling.

I will get a tear, remembering those events but fast it off. Maybe that's why I do not trust anyone anymore. Always they hurt me.

I head back home because it's getting a little late and starts to get cold.

As I walk back to the apartment I see a mane of curls walking to a super market. It looks like Alex but their dress is very different. Alex would never wear a pair of women's boots even look good in it.

He crossed the street and I entered to the grocery quickly before they lose sight. I'm back but still continues. I take a cart to disguise a little and still when it comes to a aisle.

When it turns grab a cereal after see it's Alex but he just looks at me and keeps walking.

Alex is going to ignore me?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! 
> 
> New Chapter please give me kudks and coment i will like to see wath u like. 
> 
> -someone xx


	4. Chapter 4

ALEX. POV

I'm tired of having to deal as well with Harry. If he do the wrong thing, it takes a long time to do it.

This time I get home and can not find it anywhere and that bothers me to reach a limit of rabies. I hate waiting.

I hear the sound of the door opening and I wait in the kitchen. I see he with some plastic bags.

\- Where were you? - I said in a serious tone.

\- You dont see? - Harry says pointing the bags.

\- Harry, I asked where you were.

\- In the super market near the park.

He knew he could not go there. He could not be in that area. If Louis came to see him to tell him he would approach thinking it was me. Harry knew he had no authorized go to that super market or anywhere in that area. But he seems not to care what I say and that makes me angry.

\- I told you not to go to that place! - I shouted approaching him.

\- Never let me do anything! You think you are my father, he is already dead. He died because of you, look at you are unfortunately my twin brother. What are you hiding there? You're in trouble? - Harry shouted and got even angrier.

\- I do not yell piece of shit! You have no right to know of my life. You are nothing. - I shouted back.

\- That's good to know, that I am nothing - Harry said leaving.

Have took the keys and left the house. I will talk with Harry later.

Back in the car I turn to house Louis. When I arrive at the apartment I knocked on the door.

Louis Pov.

After seeing a very different Alex went on my way home. I was a little confused with what had happened in these last few days.

I go to the bathroom and grab the knife. Is that I am to be with this but I can not help it, this is what helps me. I sit on the floor and my head shows all the bad times arrive.

First Alex, a cut appears. Alex is seen to change but do not want to believe it, another cut. I am so cowardly, another cut. Alex returns to my life and fuck me more than I am, another cut. The blood continues running and for that injury comes some relief. My tears are the pain signal.

I have so much pain in me.

I will raise and the doorbell rings. I quickly stand up and go to the washbasins to remove all the blood and wash my cut. After I wash my sell the wrist and under the sleeve of my shirt. Clean my face to remove traces of having been crying while I know it's impossible.

Road to the door and open it without looking at who, but I have an idea. Alex.

\- Hello Louis.

\- Hello - I say even looking at the floor.

\- I come or leave me out here?

I open the door a crack to enter.

\- Nice apartment - says looking around.

\- Do not make like you've never been here. - I said looking at him now.

\- I thought we were going to start from new, Tomlinson.- turning said to me.

Do not answer that because he was right.

\- What brings you here?

\- I came to see you.- smiled.

\- You see me, now you can go. - I said opening the door for him.

\- You're throwing away your house?

\- The garbage is thrown. - Answer on the defensive. Now I remember as I do not know at the supermarket.

\- What happens to you? - He asked frowning.

\- Do not Alex. You ignore me and then come to my department. That's what happens to me. I give you an opportunity, not a week goes by and you waste it. I do not know why I let you into my life the first time I saw you. - I shouted.

Rage beat the pain once more.

\- I dont know what you talking about but do not want to know. - Alex goes where I am and closes the door behind us. He is furious. - But I will not allow you to treat me like trash, motherfucker.

I feel my blood cut more bounce.

\- Go.

\- Louis was not ...

\- Get out of my house now. - I scream.

I close my eyes. I feel like away from me and I move that might happen.

\- I'm just saying that sometimes we have two similar people.

And with that Alex was closing the door behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Im late but here is another chapter. 


	5. Chapter 5

Harry Pov.

Since that I fight with Alex, he has not come home. Today is a rainy day and decided to go to the library to rent a book.

When I'm coming to the library I see a guy get into it. I feel that I've seen you before.

Enter and looked for the boy. I find walking towards a section with many books in hand. He work here?

I still not seen from the front but hey seen before that body. Short, small and perfect.

I saw the boy climbing stairs and accommodates some books he have on hand. For now he lost balance and I move to catch him before it falls to the ground and hurt.

\- You should be more careful.

He looks at me and frowns.

\- Alex, what are you doing here? - he asked angrily.

I looked confused because Alex is my twin brother but maybe the guy does not know. Maybe if I do go through Alex can get information about his life.

\- Do not look at me like that. Do not be stupid as if nothing had happened. - Separated from my brow and gather more.

\- I'm sorry ?

\- Really? With a sorry not going to solve anything Alex.

I do not even know the guy name but her eyes show pain. Alex had to have hurt because that gaze conveys a very strong suffering. And I do not blame the guy for being so with Alex, I also grieve for me as is.

\- Do not stay silent, Alex. - I get out of my thoughts and looked. - Better go.

\- I came to look ...- not let me finish talking.

\- You do not read so go away.- his eyes were angry.

And it was true, Alex does not like reading but I do. I get out the hall and go to the area of children. I always liked them read with their parents showing love. That feeling I never had.

Louis Pov.

I'm so screwed. After Alex left the hall I ran to the bathroom to mourn. All I could hear were my sobs. From my pocket I take my companion everywhere. The knife.

I take off the bandages and spend my knife arm. Not much space but I do not care. The cuts are deeper like my pain.

Alex Pov.

I have not been home since the day I fight with Harry and Louis. I'm staying at a motel near death.

I enter the "club" is rather a brothel.

\- Hello, chocolate. - seductively says Liam. - Who do you want night?

-Zayn. - When I mention the name pursed his brow a bit but then shook his head as if his thoughts away.

\- Room B-103. You can spend, it is open, it will arrive in a minute.

Way down a corridor full of rooms and entered the B-103. Its alone so Zayn should be underway. I sit on the bed and take off my shoes.

When I lie in bed I heard the door open and then close.

\- You not come in a while Alex.- Zayn said walking towards the bed.

\- Shut up and do your job. - I said curtly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter today 

**Author's Note:**

> First fan fiction hope you like it .
> 
> \- someone? xx


End file.
